Tricks that old racers get up to after retirement

[jackiewilson]

Pinch, punch, first of the month, ----white rabbits ----white rabbits ----white rabbits.
Jilly and I have this silly ritual where on the first day of each month we try to be the first to come up with saying. Don't know if it's a tradition or a ritual or how it started----my mother used to do it to me when I was a kid, got to wondering if it happened in the U.S.A.
Chucking it down here again ---absolute stair rods----was going to the flea market at Ford aerodrome----would need a wet suit or a golfing umbrella.
Kids like it when we go away----they get the run of the house and pool ---free food, beer and wine.
Workshop is locked up and out of bounds, but I do get the grass cut as a bonus. Will do an update lunchtime in about six hours. Play amongst yourselves 'till I get back.

[jackiewilson]

Went to the flea market----the Diddies were there, but only a few stalls were open.
Plenty of market gardeners flogging their wares----so there was a price war between them,
got two pots of sweet peas, a huge pumpkin plant and six runner beans----Jesus only knows why I bought them, yes I do ----got the lot for a quid .
Jilly works in the hospice shop Thursday afternoons----will just have to plant the damn things and hope she doesn't notice any different. No Willa I am not devious----everybody does it.
Got all five roller wheels well on the way, came to make the tyres, the 406 loctite adhesive for joining the rubber was solid---looked at the label and it said to keep refrigerated ----ordered some more off the net. More later.

[jackiewilson]

Someone wants to know "what's a diddy"? Well, a diddy is a diddy coy ----a gypsy ----a Romany ---- never has steady employment----but can always pull a wad of cash out of his back pocket----a wheeler dealer ---exists on the brink of legality and can always be found at flea markets and car boot sales. You have to be careful how you describe a didd, it's not politically correct to say diddy, Romany is ok----gypsy is ok,----but " a didd" is derogatory so tread lightly or you could fall foul of legal eagles and get pittled on from a dizzy height . Common sense is no longer an option. Let's get off this before I shoot myself in the foot.

[jackiewilson]

Good morning peoples---had a nice surprise when I went into S&F today, read " tagmans" thread on " Florida racing in the 60/s70s" it will bring a tear to your eye and get the little grey cells a ticking. Willabee gets mentioned in dispatches which will no doubt tickle his fancy ( doesn't take much to do that these days) .
Can't stay long this morning, Jilly is cooking breakfast and doing the last of the packing, have to check in at 14.30hrs ----boat sails from Southampton at 16.30 hrs and I have to be on best behaviour . You all talk amongst yourselves and miss me for a week. Will tell you what goes on in Norway on my return. May try and sneak the iPad aboard, but Jill can be sneaky when she wants to be, so I gotta be careful. J.

[jackie wilson]

Thought i might just clean up the shop, so opened it up and bent down to pick up screw, back locked up solid and can't hardly walk, never happened before in my life. Have to tell you her indoors is not a happy bunny. Got the usual coating ----inconsiderate of you----of all times to damage your back-----we leave in 3 hours------why did you have to go in the shop anyway. She is absolutely unrelenting i must have done it on purpose etc. etc. etc.
Took a couple of big mother cure all aspirins,-----told her a slug of Canadian Club or Jack Daniels would cure it much quicker but it was water off'n a ducks back----Jesus wept has she ever got a cob on. How unreasonable can one woman get-----like i go out deliberately and lock my back up, just to beetle her off. Bet you this will get to cost me big dollars or Kroner when we get to Bergen-----she's just buttering me up for the coupe-de-grace.
All i wanted was a quiet morning and an easy drive down the road---not much to ask on a normal friday morning---why me i ask?
Yes i have locked the shed up-----ya think I'm gonna leave it open for a week---now I'm yelling back---bad sign, what a way to start the holiday.
Need a few good wishes and a bon voyage thrown in----a couple of hail mary's would not go amiss ( would you believe predicted text said a couple of Wal-Marts would not go amiss) You just know its gonna be one of those days !!!!!!!!!!! Boat probably sailed yesterday!!!!!!!or sank at its moorings!!!!!!! Or is quarantined .talk next week

[jackiewilson]

Well, like it or not peeps-----Jackie's back in town-----all cruised out and with a head full of all the stuff and nonsense you hope I'm never gonna tell ya.
Vikings invaded England simply because for ten months of the year there's not a lot you can do in Norway, so it was a case of ." Come on lads----put on your horn head helmet, a bit of war paint----jump into a long boat and let's do some serious rape and pillage".
Small wonder Adolph lost World War Two -------the idiot sent 300,000 troopers to look after five million folk that didn't want to be looked after in the first place-----so they just got lost in the mountains (Norway has a lot more than it's fair share of them, that's why they clean up at all the Olympic ski events-----rumour has it babies were leaving the womb on skis or snow boards).
I used to groan a lot about the price of anything and everything in the UK.-----that was before I took out a second mortgage for two coffees and a Danish in Bergen.
People of America , be of good cheer, you have it made, you and me both, life is a doddle--a walk in the park-------stay where you are and thank god for what you got. From hereon in I could turn religious -------(depending on the brew).

Where to start, that is the problem, told you I ricked my back the morning we were due to leave, well it got a whole lot worse------tried hobbling-----that didn't work------So I did a lot of limping and groaning----that didn't help much either. After two days of unbearable agony, Jilly dragged me to the ships doctor-----an Italian wise arse-----you know the sort----flat of hand on spine -----hit hard with two fingers-----helps you down from ceiling with a " there, that didn't hurt DID IT."
He decided I was for real and ordered his third engineer to give me a Morphine/Cortezone jab-----will not even go there at this stage as I have not decided on the final pain and punishment that man shall suffer before his final demise. This was followed with a course of pink morfy/corty happy pills and the back improved rapidly on the third day after mahogany.
Sorry to leave you in mid something or other but her who is now indoors again has decreed it's lunchtime and it's qualifying in Spain after lunch so will ramble more later----anyway will get back to you later-----H.A.N.D Y.'ALL.

[ron54]

Welcome back Jack its been too quiet without you, looking forward to the next instalment....Phill

[jackiewilson]

Well, I got one person glad to hear I'm back-----Have to tell you all thatRon54 is really Phill who sent me that white DAC boat to play with, will get back to it one day soon.
All was not sweetness and light aboard the good ship " ECLIPSE" run by celebrity cruises---in spite of the opulence and outrageous extravagance , I got a bad dose of "THE SQUITS" which stayed with me for seven days. Don't know if it was the water or the wine----no amount of CC7s or even a six shot of their famous Martini Flight could soothe the long suffering rectum of yours truly.

Food was five star----cordon blue ----Michelin recommended ----served at express speed by immaculately dressed waiters-----full silver service. The Ritz, Savoy, and Dorchester could not have done better-----so why do I feel there was something lacking? No, there was not a hooker in sight.
Great wine list ( all an arm and a leg extra of course ) with new world stuff starting at $40 a throw.
Deals on drink started at $55 each per day----not by the longest stretch could we consume close on $850 in the eight days--(would have spent most nights emptying the old bladder for long periods).
Everything ran like clockwork-----over 3,000 passengers-----but I'm not rushing to book another trip just yet, WILLABEE will probably say I am just a cranky old bastard------could be a modicum of truth I suppose,
Time to close the iPad until tomorrow.
Lewis got pole in Spain, so the days not been all bad------night peeps.

[Rotary John]

Well, I got one person glad to hear I'm back-----Have to tell you all thatRon54 is really Phill who sent me that white DAC boat to play with, will get back to it one day soon.
All was not sweetness and light aboard the good ship " ECLIPSE" run by celebrity cruises---in spite of the opulence and outrageous extravagance , I got a bad dose of "THE SQUITS" which stayed with me for seven days. Don't know if it was the water or the wine----no amount of CC7s or even a six shot of their famous Martini Flight could soothe the long suffering rectum of yours truly.


Food was five star----cordon blue ----Michelin recommended ----served at express speed by immaculately dressed waiters-----full silver service. The Ritz, Savoy, and Dorchester could not have done better-----so why do I feel there was something lacking? No, there was not a hooker in sight.
Great wine list ( all an arm and a leg extra of course ) with new world stuff starting at $40 a throw.
Deals on drink started at $55 each per day----not by the longest stretch could we consume close on $850 in the eight days--(would have spent most nights emptying the old bladder for long periods).
Everything ran like clockwork-----over 3,000 passengers-----but I'm not rushing to book another trip just yet, WILLABEE will probably say I am just a cranky old bastard------could be a modicum of truth I suppose,
Time to close the iPad until tomorrow.
Lewis got pole in Spain, so the days not been all bad------night peeps.

I think I might agree with WILLABEE

[jackiewilson]

I think I might agree with WILLABEE

Don't you always Johnno?
Maybe you two should get married!!!
Be honest R/J-----you missed me when I WUZ gone (maybe just a tad)?

[jackiewilson]

Well, I'm on it, so might just as well say something, not that my friends out there agree or even read any of my spoutings, at least it means they woke up today which is getting to be more and more unlikely-------left the gate open there for some hefty denials by the OFF s-----nah, it's Sunday --------like cats in front of the fire-------too relaxed to pass comment------maybe tomorrow !!!!
Butlers got his head down and his arse up since the Wild West Mercury Rodeo hit OSHBERG ---hardly a peep since Lil-old-Red_Eye got itself star billing.
But it's mainly good vibes coming from the factory-----not aiming to visit any time soon .Lunch.

[jackiewilson]

My day was made the second Lewis crossed the line ahead of the Finn (why do they always call Finns ------,flying Finns?) I know there's a racing sail class called flying Finn------c'mon ---surely not.
For those of you who don't have a. Clue what I'm on about-----It was the formula 1 Spanish Grand Prix ----I get to see it occasionally on TV, one of my favourite things and L. Hamilton was the intrepid victor-----there you have it----next time out its Monte Carlo (Monaco) May 25th..

[jackiewilson]

Only a very few of my colonial friends even know there is such a thing as F1 Car racing-----I realise it's taboo so will try not to mention subject on a regular basis.
Did put the iPad in my backpack to try and keep in touch on the Norwegian voyage but her who wears the Boss badge took it out before we left. Good job on reflection as the internet connection on board is wildly expensive---and slower than Stavros getting his wallet out. $25 for thirty mins or $400 for a days hook up-------it has to be run by the mafioso (or Seebold). Daylight robbery!!!
Do like to keep in touch with you guys-------but not that much.
Nice surprise when I opened the mail-----her majesty's constabulary has issued a speeding ticket and my company is urgently requested at the magistrates court, Offering a lower fine, less points on the licence-----slapped wrist----minimum jail time if I do some community service. What service to the community I could be is way beyond my realm of thinking ----------lollipop lady on a school crossing putetre.
On the bright side, I won £25 on the premium bonds last month-------that's the tenth time in two years-------will finance a new blade for the band saw--------better'n a kick up the jacksee I suppose.
large zzzzzzzzzzzzzs coming from the other side----better call it a day and quit while I'm ahead, j.

[seeroy]

Guess what my funny talking friend. Most of the time I understand at least half of what you are writing. In person, I understand just a little bit more than that, but I certainly do enjoy every bit of it. My sweet Iris built one Cosmo Martini for herself and one for our oldest daughter this evening. Daughter stepped away for the loo and I quickly drank hers. Holy Crap!!! That was good. If I drank those every day, I might understand 3/4ths of what you write. - Seeroy (AKA Stavros)

[tagman]

Mr. Wilson....Take it from a hard core NASCAR fan (my dad was partners in fielding a "GRAND NATIONAL" car when we lived in Atlanta, Ga. in 1964) I became a racing fan when I was 9 yrs old. Back then it was dirt track races in the north Georgia mountains and around Atlanta, but as I got older all racing was my passion. Along with the OPC days supporting good friends and working for John Mc Call, I dabbled in Motocross for a while ( got too old and the kids wooped my a**), I made my first trip to the 12 hours of Sebring in 1969. Got hooked and went every year until 1978. My reason for all of this rambling is , yes I am and have been an F1 fan since the days of Jackie Stewart in the ELF Matra and then Ken Tyrrel ...Clay Regazzoni, Jack Brabham, Grahahm Hill. I have followed F1 forever. However, maybe a tad old fashioned, but I thought back then, the technology was just such and the racing was true. Much the same as when we ran twins and BPs with and without stacks on Molinari's and McCalls. Todays F1 and many series is all about the technolgy and the Engineers. I still enjoy F1, am a huge Hamilton fan....but wish that the last true (in my humble opinon) American F1 hero Mark Donohue had gone on to prosper. With that being said, thank you for your toughts that I read daily and if we ever collide at one of these OFF soiree's, I want to buy you a cold cocktail. My taste runs to an aged Bourbon known here in the states as "Angels Envy" and I guarantee its heavenly...