I drove my wife to the airport and dropped her off.
She got home 30 minutes later in a taxi and said, “What was that about?”
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I drove my wife to the airport and dropped her off.
She got home 30 minutes later in a taxi and said, “What was that about?”
Three pastors were having lunch at a diner when the conversation turned to a common problem.
The first pastor sighed and said, “Ever since summer started, my church has been overrun with mice. I’ve tried everything—loud noises, sprays, even getting a cat—but nothing works. They just won’t leave.”
The second pastor nodded and added, “Same here. My church basement is crawling with them. I’ve set traps, called in a professional, and still, they keep coming back.”
The third pastor chuckled and said, “I had the same issue, but I found a solution. I baptized all of mine and made them members of the church… Haven’t seen a single one since!”
I got thrown out of my local park after arranging the squirrels by height.
They didn't like me critter sizing. ��️
rosie odonnell who recently moved to ireland because of donald trump (tds) said she is now in love with convicted killer and murderer lyle menendez... (it) she says he is the only stright man she could ever possibly love whole heartedly forever and is awaiting his release from prison....lyle heard rosies love chants and overtures for him and.....immediatly lyle said... he is a totally a full blown gay man...that only... listens to queen .... and asked prison officials to be locked up in prision forever without parole...and would rather have a 1000 bars of ivory soap. rosies previous love attractions were son of sam david berkowitz, ted bundy, btk dennis raider(beat...then torture...then kill), green river killer gary ridgeway, zodiac, jeffrey dalmer and charles manson
Attachment 541997
Bundy frequently revisited the bodies of those he abducted, grooming and performing sex acts on the corpses until decomposition and destruction by wild animals made further interactions impossible.
Attachment 542015
Attachment 542016the bros repeatedly fired shotgun blast into their parents heads until their heads were blown clean off....then bought porsches and rolexs.... teaching their parents a valuable lesson....
Quote:
Originally Posted by SUNKIST
It clearly says - - - "Dumb Jokes", Kyle doesn't sound that dumb!
Attachment 541998
Tesla is truly smart technology!!I bought a new Tesla!! Had to go back to the dealer the other day because I couldn't get the radio to work.The service technician explained that the radio was voice-activated."Nelson," the technician said to the radio.The radio replied, "Ricky or Willie?" "Willie" he continued and "On The Road Again" flowed from the speakers.Then he said, "Ray Charles", and in an instant "Georgia On My Mind" replaced Willie Nelson.I drove away so happy and for the next few days every time I'd say, "Beethoven", I'd get beautiful classical music, and if I said, "Beatles", I'd get one of their awesome songs.Well, yesterday, this woman ran a red light and nearly smashed into my new Tesla, but luckily, I swerved in time to avoid her.I yelled at her, "Crazy Bitch"!The radio replied, "Hillary, Maxine, Kamala, Warren, AOC, or Pelosi?"God, I love this car!
Where do surfers go for an education?
Boarding school
Why doesn't it hurt if someone throws a can of Coke at your head?
Because it's a soft drink
What do French hedgehogs see on Groundhog Day?
Their chateau
What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?
A stick