why is it

[bulldogdaddy]

that it only takes us guys 20 to 30 mins. topps to get ready for a function and the women is always different. ms.bdd started at 2.30 and still isn't ready. bet if there was a sale at macy's they'd be there with their bra and panties on!

[VectorPat]

Even worse are the ones that wait until they are driving in the car, then put on their make-up while talking on the cell phone,smoking a cigarette with a screaming kid in the back seat..

[sho305]

Have to admit mine is pretty good, but I think it is related to the time of day. When they have to get up at 5am, they get ready faster:) 5pm, real slow:confused:

[GP-1]

Leave without 'em..... You only have to do it once....

[Ally 1988]

Your right but my wife is cool as hell she knows what it means to be on time. I don't like to be late for anything she knows this and she's the same way. But I have a friend who will leave her in a heartbeat if he tells her we have to be there buy 7:00 Pm brother he means it.

[GP-1]

Of course BDD was really close to another good idea... Drag them out the door in their bra and panties...

You guys starting to get some idea about why I'm single????

[Doubledog]

Actually, I'm the one thats a drag ass. Only for work can I get a fire under my feet.:rolleyes:

[sho305]

I'll tell you, when it is summer up here and a weekend....you almost need a chain to drag me to a "function";) My time!:cool:

[Rickracer]

I'm starting to wonder why you're not incarcerated. :D :D :D

[KaptainKirk]

Ah hell you making me jealous !!

I am probably about to get married.......

And da lady IS NEVER ON TIME !:(:(

SUCKS :(:(

Ya know what.....I TELL YOU WHAT.......

If I am supposed to be there at 7 that means I always show 15 minutes early.....if I am there 10 til 7 I am 5 minutes late !!

ALL my life I been that way.....NOW ah hell sometimes I am so late I feel lucky they let us in!!!

Damn woman !!

K.K.

[RedAllison]

with LONG tan legs, "lions mane" blonde hair, NO bikin lines (wink wink) and the fact that she likes summer dresses with NO panties or bras, WHO CARES HOW LONG SHE TAKES??? Ive had extra mirrors installed in the bathroom just so I can watch the "dollin up" process in action! Gettin there late and leavin early is what its all about anyway.

Shes a creation of nature, a clocks simply a manmade invention!
RA

[Tom D.]

My Inlaws(brothers, sisters, mother & father) are always late. I've gotten into the habit of telling them an hour earlier for any givin funcution. That way everybody is there on time!:D

Tom

[GP-1]

Originally posted by Rickracer
I'm starting to wonder why you're not incarcerated. :D :D :D



Ah Geez......


I bet almost 95% of the stuff I do is legal....



KK... Getting married??? That might be a good time to show up late -- only a week or two.. Just tell her you were testing the relationship...... wanted to be sure it was strong.
Seriously.. Good luck!!

You're gonna need it (I can never leave well enough alone.:D )

[Rickracer]

:eek: :D ;)

[outboards4life]

Really? Where is Macy's and when is there next sale?:D :D

[sho305]

Whenever Wynona Rider goes there!:)

[bulldogdaddy]

ain't that the good ol 5 finger discount? but with all the dope she had on her maybe she didn't know what she was doing!

[Barefoot Bob]

Originally posted by RedAllison
with LONG tan legs, "lions mane" blonde hair, NO bikin lines (wink wink) and the fact that she likes summer dresses with NO panties or bras, WHO CARES HOW LONG SHE TAKES??? Ive had extra mirrors installed in the bathroom just so I can watch the "dollin up" process in action! Gettin there late and leavin early is what its all about anyway.

Shes a creation of nature, a clocks simply a manmade invention!
RA

MIRROR's????
I used to have them all over the bedroom(ceiling,walls etc....)

Built the new house and everyone askes me where the mirror's are. I point to the AV jacks on the TV in the bedroom, and tell them thats where I hook the video camera. Now i'm in the movies:D :D :D

Who needs to leave the house....LOL

[bulldogdaddy]

how often does connie vist the site,lmao:eek:

[sho305]

Yeah, another hollywood addict trying to buy her way to heaven or something. What a joke.

Hey Bob, is that you I seen on that porno site?? :D :D lol:p :p

[Barefoot Bob]

And thats a real good thing
;) :rolleyes:

[Barefoot Bob]

That must be where that one tape went that i'm missing.

They better give me my cut on that tape.

BDD....its kinda like that movie we were all watching last night...LOL:D

[sho305]

How did you hook that swingy-thing to the ceiling?

And what kind of motor makes it spin around?


:eek: :D:D LOL:D :eek: Hehehe;)

[Barefoot Bob]

I thought you have seen pictures of the house. Its a big A frame and I have the whole trapeeze act hooked to the beams in the ceiling;)

Its like one BIG jungle gym..LOL

[sho305]

Oh Gawd that is a nice house! I am just waisting my time with these fans on the ceiling here....:eek:


:D

[Barefoot Bob]

It just makes it more of a challange with that blade spinning around:D

[GP-1]

Ahhhhhhhh Geez Bob......


Something came up.. I'm not going to be able to make it this summer............

[Barefoot Bob]

Just bring Helga with. She will protect ya:D

[GP-1]

Maybe we could try putting Helga in your swing.....

Does your camera have a wide angle lens??

[Barefoot Bob]

But I better use my Kevlar barefoot rope for the swing just to make sure it dont break:D

Man, How the heck do we get so far off track? BDD was saying the same thing about my thread. But it sure does help pass the time till spring. And I hope we are entertaining everyone along the way.

Anyone care to jump in???? Feel free anytime:D

[bulldogdaddy]

on the phone with bob last night and he's watching some caveman porno movie! had rea dawn chong on it.she was hairy as helga:eek:

[GP-1]

Hey,

Helga's not hairy.... It's a lot of maintenance, but she stays smooth. It's either 12 bottles of Nair, or 9 Mach III cartridges and 4 1/2 cans of Edge (a lot of swearing during that one..)

[sho305]

you can get those hedge trimmers now, that might save you some time.....

[GP-1]

I had a weed wacker, but the noise scared her....

[Barefoot Bob]

ROTFLMAO:D :D :D :D

[sho305]

Electric mower? Sheep shears maybe?



FLOWBEE!!!!:D :D :D

[GP-1]

Oh??????

and you wanna piss off something that weighs 700lbs.??

[Barefoot Bob]

Ya, he met her out on a hunting trip. He told everyone he met her at the bar, but we started to wonder. She keeps growing all that darn hair and grunts funny.

[GP-1]

Yea, but if you ever need to change a tire.. and you forgot your jack...

It's pretty impressive.. she flipped my friend's Dodge Powerwagon with one hand......

[sho305]

Sounds like she is a real bear to get along with, maybe some moose in that hair could help? I mean, holy cow:) that is a ton to deal with there. You gotta find something that would hog:) that hair of there nicely, or she might get to stampeeding:D around all POed like a hipo and that would not be cool:cool: :cool: ;)

[Barefoot Bob]

This all started Because of one picture:D

[GP-1]

No No No..


Don't get her near a moose... Must have been a bad childhood experience, but she hates moose (mooses? moosi?)..

[sho305]

Really? Seems like she could scare the hell out of a moose one way or another....not the other way around.:eek:

[GP-1]

C'mon you guys, that's not very nice.. Even when she's bulking up, Helga can barely hit 850... those moose can weigh 1200-1300.

and Helga's got no antlers (that I've been able to find anyway..)

[sho305]

Yeah...but due to the human way of standing upright....she would offer a much larger frontal area, thus appearing bigger:) to the moose then say, another moose. Yes??:confused: I don't know any moose to ask...so maybe the moose would not care anyway.

She can bulk up?

[GP-1]

Oh yea!!! She can bulk up..

I was thinkin' about turning her into a sumo, but she doesn't like rice or fish very much... (kinda strange for a Bigfoot, but who knows...)

Now I think were going to enter her in UFC (unlimited fighting championship..) -- SUUUUPER heavyweight division.

[Barefoot Bob]

What about the concert? you guys in so we can party?:D

[GP-1]

I haven't got in touch with him.. You wanna sent him a PM?

[Barefoot Bob]

Yup, I will do that

[Ally 1988]

Okay now I have A problem with goings on here on S@F. Let’s take a look back here to the two womeeeeeennnnnnnsssss on the back of that truck. If I were ever going to delete a post it would have to be that one. I’m sorry a line has to be drawn somewhere. I’ve had to go to so many different videos trying to erase that memory.
So if you don’t mind please help me erase my memory of that horrible seen it is completely uncalled for to treat a truck that way. Well anyway thank God it was a Ford know other truck could handle that.

ROTFLMAO.
:eek: :eek: :eek:

[Barefoot Bob]

Its no wonder all them tail gate on them Ford that come in my shop are bowed so bad. Hell, I would bow too with all that weight.

Wednsday I get my module back for my truck. It will be pumping out over 430HP then. I wish I could find some hefty babes like that. I figure if they sit on my tailgate and we tie them there real good with cycle tie downs and kevlar ski rope. I should be able to do some real sweeeeet wheelies. Just like Jesse James did with that Ford van on Monster Garage:D :D :D

Tomorrow I get my Bull bar on the front. Never know when Helga might jump out in front of me on the road;)

[Ally 1988]

Now you know horsepower is one thing. But aluminum cans is a whole nother thing. That’s a lot Pork there. I thought your truck was just a 2500 series. Its okay that you try this feet just take some precautions. Like add some more wheels and tires. I think one with duel rear wheels is more what you might want to try this with. Or a RollBack something you know Heavy Duty.:eek:

[Barefoot Bob]

My truck is the HD with the 1 ton frame. The thing I worry about are the 10 ply tires. They can only handle so much weight over the tires you know:eek:

[sho305]

Yeah, I'm not sure that truck is made to haul livestock. You don't see people driving around with elephants in a pickup box do you? In fact, that might void your warranty when you bust an axle or bend the frame:eek: Just how you going to come up with a story to cover that when the box of your truck smells like a bovine whorehouse???:D :D :D :D :D

[Barefoot Bob]

Originally posted by sho305
Just how you going to come up with a story to cover that when the box of your truck smells like a bovine whorehouse???:D :D :D :D :D

Dont worry bout that:D They all know me already:rolleyes:

[sho305]

THINKING!! I shoulda known:rolleyes:

[Barefoot Bob]

All they would say at the dealership is....Now what the hell were ya doing:D

[Ally 1988]

Just the picture itself covers more than a ton. Just check them hamhocs on those two. :eek: :eek: I havent went to a porn sight in since last year but I think I may need get an adjustment.:D :D

[Barefoot Bob]

I think you better treat your self to something to get that visual out of your head;) :D

[sho305]

Here, this should help to get you started on the road to recovery after that terrifying elephant truck experience: http://www.boatsandbikinis.com/daily_bikini.htm

:cool: :cool:

[GP-1]

You guys never mention the positive side.. I mean, how many of you have women that can protect you from a grizzly bear...

Look, if you were stuck in the wilderness with her, you could saw off chunks to burn in the fire... If you ran into a river, you could use her as a rubber raft... (or a bridge..). There's almost no downside... except for the disconcerting list my house is starting on..

[sho305]

Problem is, you are making us all feel bad:(

See, we have the greatest boating family here of small, mostly <20' boats. We all like to hang and help out our fellow boaters whenever possible. But, we are all scared you are going to show up with her....and there is just no way any of us could take her for a ride in our boat....it would sink:eek: The last thing any of us would want to do is let down a fellow boater by not being able to simply show this common courtesy.:rolleyes:

I'm sorry I had to say it first, as we all feel very sad about it and it has been weighing heavily on our minds ever since the Ford truck pic.:o



:D :D :D

[Barefoot Bob]

You can come with me. Like I said, I will just leave out the fat sack. We should still have a dam good wake:D

[GP-1]

Geez Bob, calling her a "fat sack" is kinda mean..

[Barefoot Bob]

OH, dont take it the wrong way. I ment it in a very good way. I'll bet she is alot of fun to float on at the lake also:D

Now what about that concert. You going:rolleyes:

[sho305]

Once I seen a bunch of kids with a waterbed mattress 2/3 full of air in the lake. They were having all kinds of fun on that thing;) 3 or 4 of them on top of it an once!:D

[GP-1]

What was the date?? May 1?

[Barefoot Bob]

Friday night.....So, are you in? should be alot of fun:) ;)

[GP-1]

I'll make sure I don't have any obligations.. You got any good bars down there??

[Barefoot Bob]

Heck!!!!!! This is the home of Schells and Haunstien Beer. We just took over some beer from the Cities that was shutting down also. We have way to many bars.

I even have one in my house and I dont even drink:rolleyes:

[Jason Huber]

Originally posted by Barefoot Bob
Heck!!!!!! This is the home of Schells...:rolleyes: Ah-yes - Schells Buckhorn!! Is that stuff still-like $2.49 for a case of bottles??:D

[Barefoot Bob]

There price went way the hell up to Millers prices now that they are becoming well known

[Jason Huber]

I thought you guys were talking about THIS weekend! I'm in - if the offer still stands!(?) GP - maybe we can take your new ride down there & go in style!!?? :cool: Also, Fri. is cool for the 600, not sure yet about Sun. for the 200... I'm taking care of a Pet Crew dog this weekend... :rolleyes: Oh-ya! Bob, you should start drinkin' Rolling Rock :D Its' still cheap!!

[sho305]

Man, I'm in the cheap seats...I don't drink much beer, but at the lake everyone drinks Milwalkees Best, mostly light. I like the New Castle the best myself, if I want a good beer.

[GP-1]

Originally posted by sho305
Man, I'm in the cheap seats...I don't drink much beer, but at the lake everyone drinks Milwalkees Best


Their best what??????

How about Blatz light cream ale????? :(


I'll just bring a bottle of Jack Daniels......

[Barefoot Bob]

They say they are going fast. So I better get them tomorrow. The guy that works for me got his on the net. He said it cost him $38.00. I am goint to get mine at the civic center so it should be lots cheeper.

I used to drink OLD Millwackey...LOL...Only I drank over a 12 pack a night, for many, many years. So I was a big drunk. Time to quit:)

[GP-1]

Originally posted by Jason Huber
I thought you guys were talking about THIS weekend! I'm in - if the offer still stands!(?) GP - maybe we can take your new ride down there & go in style!!?? :cool: Also, Fri. is cool for the 600, not sure yet about Sun. for the 200... I'm taking care of a Pet Crew dog this weekend... :rolleyes: Oh-ya! Bob, you should start drinkin' Rolling Rock :D Its' still cheap!!



I'm thinkin' it should be warm enough to ride down by then.. My new ride is a big POS..


Bob, should I send you a check.. or how do you wanna do it??

BTW.. How could you drink a 12-pack of that crap?? I wouldn't be worried about becoming an alcoholic, but that must have been like a 10 year bout of dysentery.......

[Barefoot Bob]

Man!!!! Your way more edgumacated than I am...LOL...Im not to good with big words. I dont spell to get either...LOL

Just tell me how many tickets I should get? Is it just you and Jason? I will pick them up tomorrow night and let you know how much they are.

[GP-1]

Yes.... I am impressive:cool: I know almost three big words.. If you force me to, I'll pull them out and use them..


Yea, I think only two...


What time do the Village People come on??

[Barefoot Bob]

How is that for big words...LOL

I will pick up 2 extra tickets.

The village people cum on at 7 rite after men at work

[GP-1]

[QUOTE]Originally posted by Barefoot Bob
How is that for big words...LOL

I will pick up 2 extra tickets.

The village people cum on at 7 rite after men at work






Who can it bee now???????????:eek:

[Jason Huber]

Ya, And I'll be there representing the George Micheal/WHAM Fan Club!!!:eek: ... Wake me up before you G-Go!!... :rolleyes:

[Barefoot Bob]

So are you guys planning on riding the bikes down here?

[AQUAholic]

my wife is out in the car waiting for me.

I guess I'm a little slow sometimes, make that most times.

Must be that I fit into this "southern" lifestyle better than her.

[Jason Huber]

Would be cool to ride :cool: - weather permitting...

[GP-1]

It'll probably snow, and we'll be stuck at Bob's until the 4th of July...

[Barefoot Bob]

Then we cantake brads sleds out:)

[GP-1]

Bob, you seem like a nice guy, but three guys on a snowmobile ain't my idea of fun...


Maybe you can pull the chair behind a sled???????

[Barefoot Bob]

Did you see the pic on here a wihile back with 3 naked guys on a sled:D :D :eek:

[Jason Huber]

Trying NOT to...:rolleyes:

[sho305]

What? You mean you are not going to take Helga sledding with you????

[Barefoot Bob]

I picked up our tickets for Disturbed....$31.00 each

I see David Coperfield is going to be there real soon. Thoughs tickets are a bit more spendy. But it would be worth it if he can make that Horny Goat disapear:eek: :D

[Jason Huber]

:D :D :D :D

[sho305]

Helga's disturbed horney-goat chasing Bambi around the barnyard in the snow with his pole:D Down on the farm....at Barefoot Bobs!

:D :D :D :D

Snowing like crazy here:rolleyes:

[Barefoot Bob]

We got 5 " overnight. I hait this crap and want spring. The boat is all ready for the first speed run.

[GP-1]

Originally posted by Barefoot Bob
Did you see the pic on here a wihile back with 3 naked guys on a sled:D :D :eek:


Thanks a lot for that one...:(

[Barefoot Bob]

I think you missed out on the post with the goat. Here it is about 4 post's down.:D :D

http://forums.screamandfly.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=29189&perpage=15&pagenumber=12

[sho305]

No doubt Bob, as you can see I think it is affecting my brain now. I have not had a drink all weekend either. :confused:

Never seen naked guys on a sled, and I don't want to. Or I'll post naked women on something:) Fair is fair:D

[GP-1]

The goat thing came from Bob's confession at church...... By the way.. It's Saturday again..


Father..... It's Bob again... I'm sorry to be bothering you again so soon, but I'm really having some problems... The goat's run away from home.. I think he was jealous of the sheep.. which was ridiculous because I loved them both equally..... but the damn parrot is the one that's really causing trouble... Did you know those things could talk?? I sure didn't.... and every time somebody comes over he's blabbing on about that one night.... Listen, no matter what he says, it isn't my fault all his feathers fell out.. He was a willing participant.. nobody was forced.. Anyway, if you could just help me find Billy (the goat, of course), I'd promise to remain faithful..... well, at least cut way back on the sheep...

[Jason Huber]

GOAT! :eek: :eek: :eek:

[GP-1]

Jason, what's the plan for tomorrow?

[Barefoot Bob]

Gary!!!!! You are a true stand up comedian:D I was really loosing it as I read that:D That was so funny;)
I am accually getting ready to head to church here at 5:30. bought this new Holland grill. I told Connie to take the roasting post I purchased with it and shove it up that chickens behind. I hope the parrot doest see that or he will tell everyone:rolleyes: :D

[Jason Huber]

Not sure on the timing. Have to take care of a Pet Crew dogs 3 times during the day, today/tomorrow... Call you mid morning?